The Big “C”–Part 1

I write romance.

Big revelation, right?

Why do I do so?

Because I can, was the last answer I gave at one of my last blogstops (, but I’ve been thinking about it a little more since then. (Okay, so the idea for this essay started with the opener sentence to this post sometime early on the morning of 4/9 this year and wouldn’t leave me alone until I started hashing it out.)

I’m married, too, celebrating my fifteenth anniversary on 4/29, the day this posted. I remember spending years praying for “the one” so that I could walk down the aisle and then have kids. Three grown stepsons and two rapidly growing boys later, my prayers have been answered. I have a husband who truly loves me. (Yes, it’s mutual and despite the differences, sometimes I look at those very luminescent green eyes of his—green is my favorite color for anything—and am sometimes still surprised at how handsome he is. Plus, he loves being my hero—yes, there’s a post for that at my blog.) The boys? Each presents some kind of challenge, at present mostly from the full-timers, a ‘tween’ and a ‘teen.’ I have also been blessed to share a good relationship with my ‘part-timers,’ who at 25, 21 and 19 are now ‘all grown up.’ 


 Is my life what I thought it would be? Hard to say, except I realize now that I had NO idea what I expected. Definitely not the sweep-me-away Woodiwiss romances which were my favorites in my teens and early twenties.

Do I love my life?

Most days.

Many days.

Some days.

And other days, I’d give it all up just for peace, quiet, no one calling my name or expecting anything of me. Give me my laptop, a pretty space to work and a flowing story idea: happiness is mine.

So, despite writing romance and these awesome men who really look out for their ladies and kids you forget are there, I’m living reality.  Obviously, the days I love my life are easy. The in-between days are there, and being fortunate enough to not sweat too much of the small stuff or the things I can’t control or change, I can handle them.

Then there are those ‘other’ days. What gets me through?

The “C” word.

Easy enough to say.


A whole other thing to live. And that I’ll discuss tomorrow. Y’all come back now, y’hear?

In the meantime, feel free to start a discussion and share your feelings on this topic. Tell me what the “C-word” is to you and how you show it in different aspects of your life: family, job, self, etc. 

Don’t forget, those who leave a comment will be entered in a random drawing for a digital copy of No Matter Why. If you already have yours, pass this link on to a friend or someone you think might enjoy the post.

Thanks so much for stopping by and don’t forget to check in tomorrow! I’ll post the winner on Sunday and notify that person by e-mail. 



9 thoughts on “The Big “C”–Part 1

  1. Great post…beautiful pictures. Happy Anniversary!

    My hubby and I have been blessed with twelve wonderful years together. We are completely committed to each other and our life together.

    In a completely different way I am committed to my day job and being a writer.

    Keeping all of those commitments balanced is another thing entirely. I’d like to say my hubby always comes first and foremost, but in the middle of basketball season or edits, that doesn’t always happen. But we understand and support each other when those other commitments get in the way of “us”.


    1. Being committed to each other and to the marriage makes all the difference, especially when life gets in the way. Thanks, Debra!


  2. A truly lovely post – and what wonderful photographs! I keep wondering if I recognize that pond…

    I’ve written a lot about commitment and don’t want to repeat myself here, so I’ll keep it brief. Commitment means valuing the unity of the two of you, even when you find it incredibly difficult to speak up about something that’s hurt you, or to listen to his perspective. It means respecting his feelings and judgment while also respecting your own, and then finding ways to make them mesh together. And it means enjoying a sense of togetherness so deep and lasting that you often don’t need words to communicate. In fact, one of our most frequent ways to get the other to laugh is to say, “Hey! Stop being in my head!”


  3. Happy anniversary! We celebrated our 34 one in February.
    We all need some time to ourselves though. The peace and quiet or whatever is good for you, you need.
    Good luck and many more!!!


  4. What a great post, Joanna. Congratulations on your anniversary–beautiful wedding pictures!



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